p.526
   I watch them(my mother and Auntie Helen(Hulan)) continue to argue,
although perhaps it is not arguing.  They are remembering together,
dreaming together.  They can already see it, the walk
up the mountain, that time they were so young, when
they believed their lives lay ahead of them and all good
things were still possible.  And the water is just as they
imagined, heavy as gold, sweet as rare flower seeds.
   I can taste it too.  I can feel it.  Only a little amount
and it is enough to remember---all the things you
thought you had forgotten but were never forgotten,
all the hopes that can sill be found.

p.531
   So I bought that mistake.  I fixed it.  I used my gold
paints and wrote her name on the bottom.  And Helen
bought good incense, not the cheap brand, but the
best.  I could see this lady statue in here new house, the
red temple altar with two candlesticks lighting up her
face from both sides.  She would live there, but no one
would call her Mrs. Kitchen God.  Why would she
want to be called that, now that she and her husband
are divorced?
   When Pearl came to drop off the children at my
house this weekend, I said to her husband, "Go watch
TV with the children.  I have to give my daughter
some medicine I found."
   I took her upstairs to my bedroom.  Pearl-ah, I said.
Here is some Chinese medicine.  You put this pad on
your arms and legs, the herbs sink into your skin.  And
every day you should drink hot water three or four
times a day.  Your energy is too cold.  Just hot water,
no tea or coffee inside.  Are you listening?
   What are you looking at?  Oh, that statue.  You never
saw that before.  Yes, that's true, very fancy, fine porcelain.
And the style is good too.  See how nicely she
sits in her chair, so comfortable-looking in her manner.
Look at her hair, how black it is, no worries.
Although maybe she used to worry.  I heard she once
had many hardships in her life.  So maybe her hair is dyed.
   But her smile is genuine, wise and innocent at the
same time.  And her hand, see how she just raised it?
That means she is about to speak, or maybe
she is telling you to speak.  She is ready to listen.  She
understands English.  You should tell her everything.
   Yes, yes, of course this is for you!  Why would I buy
such a thing for myself?  Don't cry, don't cry.  I didn't
pay too much.
   But sometimes, when you are afraid, you can talk
to her.  She will listen.  She will wash away everything
sad with her tears.  She will use her stick to chase away
everything bad.  See her name:  Lady Sorrowfree,
happiness winning over bitterness, no regrets in this world.
   Now help me light three sticks of incense.  The smoke
will take our wishes to heaven.  Of course, it's only
superstition, just for fun.  But see how fast the smoke
rises---oh, even faster when we laugh, lifting our
hopes, higher and higher.

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